I knew that some people might read this and think what an a**hole I am to
diss my aunt. I'm not. I have nothing against my aunt (in fact I see her as a
fun, glamourous and caring mother), what I am against is what she said - those
are two different things. I have no intention to bitch about her; I was simply
expressing my concern over her claim, which I feel is very popular among many
here.
The irony that was presented within the post is not there to condemn her as
a person, but to show how ironic a lot of people are when they are classifying
"culture"; don't you see the irony and the hypocrisy? preaching about how our
culture is lost but you're not exactly preserving it yourself? A lot of people I
know are like that.. I never really touched the issue, because I know that I
myself am guilty of such offence; I speak English more than half the time! If
you call me a contradiction, I agree... I love the richness of my culture, but
for some reason, I am just more comfortable speaking English.
Again, I'm not trying to diss my aunt, I apologise if anyone sees it that
way. I spoke of general things that derived specifically from her
statement.
Discrimination and stereotype of this kind is an anathema to me, it doesn't matter to me who said it... but it's been said, and if you've been following my blog, you'd have known that the issue is a huge anathema to me.
Just because I disagree to what she said.. Am I really being disrespectful? This is not communism, are we not allowed our own opinions anymore? Must we agree over a particular ideology - particularly when family ties are in the line? If I disagree over something - particularly over a topic that is very sensitive to me - I will not be quiet.
I would've understood anyone calling me disrespectful if I spend the entire post backbiting her, but I wasn't (I even mentioned how wonderful of a mother she is!), I just took her statement and presented my point of view over that.
The issue is on culture and race and how people easily condem one in order to make another sound more superior. A lot of people do that - and I see that as a form of racial stereotyping or discrimination.
If you were in any of my classes, you would've known how sensitive I am about this issue, because I kept presenting on it; I even make it a habit calling "kadai K*ling" as "kadai runcit".
Here I am talking about wanting equality and integration between races and cultures, and some people are just stuck to the idea of me disrespecting my aunt, just because I disagree with something she said.
Some just could not get the idea that I was NOT dissing her. I wasn't. I wasn't dissing about her as a person, I took what she said and coupled it up with the mindset of many, because a lot of people have that mindset. I find that quite depressive.
//updated//
So I eventually found out what caused the stir with the family, unfortunately I wouldn't be able to sit and discuss the situation like how you all (assuming you're reading this) wanted at the moment, because I won't be around until next week.
Regardless.. I found out that the said aunt was upset with what I said in the first post before my final editing of it. Yes, I admit, the first time I wrote and published it, I was angry and therefore it was published at first based on that particular angst. And then I got to my senses, and editted the unnecessary bits out (because I find that particular bit to be a bit harsh)- and this happened a day after (or within the day of) my first publishing of the said post.
To my knowledge, what I have deleted has lost its significance to the entire situation and I was hoping that nobody would read it, it's not like I expect people to read my posts the MOMENT I clicked "publish". Unfortunately, that wasn't entirely the case. But I want to make it clear, that I know when to and when NOT to cross the line; that bit crossed the line and it has been deleted weeks ago. If anyone managed to read that before it was deleted- I apologise because I know that was a bit harsh.
note: the post has not been edited since, as far as I'm concerned, that is the original; unless it has been tampered with in some other website I do not know about.
Muaz Al Rashid
I don't like commenting on the cBox, because it all gets lost in the clutter. So I might have not read a few points in the cBox.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. Disagreement should never be mistaken with disrespect. They are two completely different things.
Disagreement is simply not agreeing with a point of view and then argue sensibly why you disagree with it, which I think is what you have done. Disrespect is humiliating the person, questioning their intelligence and never actually saying why you disagree with the person.
And I completely agree with you about swearing as not being a part of culture, or that no culture can be said as negative.
I'm a linguist, and I've learnt that no language is superior to another. Not even hybrid ones (called pidgins or creoles), like Singlish or Manglish. It all comes down to what you're most comfortable with.
To say swearing is not a part of Malay culture is in itself meaningless. Swearing is not part of culture, period. If someone say it's part of Western culture, that's definitely wrong. It's not, as much as it is not a part of Malay culture.
Or else they wouldn't have censorship (bleep!) or those parental advisory stickers on CDs which contain a lot of swearing. Swearing is indeed, arguably, a natural way to vent out some anger or frustration. But is it appropriate? Most of the time not.
Never mind the term Western culture is actually very vague. Which part of the West? USA? UK? France? These countries practice very different cultures. Just like when you refer to Asian culture. Are you referring to the Indians? The Chinese? The Thais? The Malays?